The past is alive and it creates a surreal reality.

All of a sudden.

I am so small.

I have nothing left.

I threw it all away.


I try to talk.

I am not heard.

I try to feel.

I am just hurt.

The new sphere of sorrow and mind misery.

Where I am.

I am trying to run.

I hope I will take the right turn.

Away from this morbid reality.

That slowly breaks me down.



The hardest thing in life must be sorrow and broken heart.

I faced them both this week.

Your world stops and nothing ever means anything no more.

Happiness and joy can not exist.

Life must go on.

My sorrows never ends.

Still it can turn.

Evrything can come again.

It can all return.

The joy and the meaning of life.

My happiness, my everlasting strife.

I never been good inviting folks to events. If I´ve been it is because I do paid others to do it for me.

So if you are not invited, I do not mean to exclude you. It it feels that you belong you are free to come.

It is all about them of you whom feels I can give.

So you can take.

Never to abuse.

Just to use.

Because there is only one whom can take, use and abuse my soul.

The one whom already stole my heart away from you others.

What is true never dies.

Some times it changes directions.

It just never dies.

Because it is the naked truth.

The most inner you can ever feel.

Sooner or later t will come back and haunt you.

Chase your mind.

Stalk your steps.

It will be with you night after night.

It just neither walks away or dies.

It will sway behind you in the shadows for thousands of years.

It is for one reason.

People are good at hiding away from it.

They realize sometimes too late.

Because it will never die.


Unspoken? When is someone unspoken? Unexpressed? Maybe silence is a way to express a lot for some. What if they talk a lot when they are comfortable. Why is the reason to talk at all if you got nothing to say to the other person or persons present? When I was young I was louder to some. because I did have nothing to say but did anyhow because I thought you had to. What if it is easier to be social where you do feel comfortable these days without words but with many thoughts? No words do not mean no thoughts but many words can mean no thoughts. We all know these folks that keeps talking too much despite they got nothing that matters to say. Some like it that way. Some like it other ways. Some people do believe, some people do know. Some people do not know neither do they believe. There is seldom no relevance in what other people do say. I am not too puzzled by most people. I never been. For the fascinating ones my enthusiasm is burning. At least every now or every then. Though dedication is just aimed to a very few chosen ones. A very few. Sometimes I do drift apart from them or maybe  from you and even from me. I know it, still not puzzled by it.

Thoughts are floating.

The endless.

The nothing.

The it.

The all.

Everywhere I go there is something there. The taste can be amazing but it´s texture maybe not speak your words.

Speaking about words. When do words speak to you? They rarely speak to me. It do not matter who or what. They just rarely do. What keeps me a daydreamer, living my life somewhere else. Why don´t you come with me? We can go very far. I know this place, an immortal dimension. I know it very well. Days will not be counted. Just our faith in this. Just our love for that.What if I ever thought and you never said? Then we are building an obstacle. Then we are devastating magic. We are losing time because we do not know because you never said. Whatever it ever damaged what can it repair? We are not torn apart but you never said. You never did.

Got too many impressions lately.

Do not know where to put them.

Maybe they are no good.

Maybe they are just in the way.

What if I can learn a something.

What if I can not.

Why should I leave it all just there?

Is there a reason to go through with it all.

One day I will see.

One day I will find out.

Where I will be that day and it will mean to me.

Only I will ever know.


I am so loud.

I can never break silence.

I am so loud.

You can not hear me.

I am so loud.

I scream for no one.

I am so loud.

I face my fear.

I am so loud.

I am close to nothing.

I am so loud.

You turn away.

I am so loud. 

I am lonely.

I am so loud.

I do not have any pride.

I am so loud.

My hair turns grey.

I am so loud.

I can’t compete with wispers.

I am so loud.

You can not see me in the dark.

I am so loud.

I’ll fear an empty glass.

I am so loud.

You play me out.

I am so loud.

The weird and the poor.

I am so loud.

I am so loud.

I am so loud.

I am so loud.

I am so loud.

I could not hear you.

I am so loud maybe I never will.

I am so loud.

I never found the breaks.

I am so loud.

I am loud.

I am so loud.

Just turned around.

I never ought to turn around.




Sometimes you take too stupid decisions.

Realize them way too late.

You suffered all these years for no reason.

You did not turn around.

You took a stupid decision.

One days your steps are heavy.

You do not have much more than the heavy steps.